**warning: this is a SUPER DUPER LONG entry.. please do not read if you are not prepared to take crap from me..

yesterday i put on make-up to work.. haha.. made a fool of myself i guess.. i use the eyeliner i bought yesterday with lena at carrefour.. they said my dressing was not like i am going to work.. haha.. which i thought so too but then do i care? NO.. :P i think everyone was shocked that i put on make up..lolz.. i made a huge commotion.. haha..

they said i look like i am going clubbin coz i was wearing skirt and make up as well.. but then again,everytime i wear skirt,i am going clubbin according to them.. haha.. super funny.. then after that they told me it is because of the shoes and not because i wear skirts.. diaoz.. then that xiaojia super funny de.. message me to say tat she teased me with kimwei.. diaoz.. coz he said i look prettier and more ke ai.. haha..i should be honored rite??

then ah soon asked me to let down my hair,coz no body will put on make up and still tie up the hair one..lol..but then do i look like i care? haha.. anyway,i think i tie half better.. haha.. if dun tie look very messy.. lol.. haha.. then he also said that if i go to the pub there will be a lot of guys asking my number..haha.. super gao xiao the way they say it..

then there was this counselling session whereby they asked me why i didnt want to continue studying.. yup,i was thinking of actually quiting school and start workin early.. i wont be bothering about this if i was in the poly.. but then again if i was in the poly,i wouldnt have gotten this job perhaps.. lol.. wad a contradictory.. and who know that i will enjoy poly life..

would have been better if i could go to poly after my JC studies.. i didnt know that if i were to go to poly i can get to the 2nd year immediately and i could have gotten into either SMU,NTU or even NUS if i work hard in the poly.. and other than that i can even gain experience in presentation,which i wasnt trained in JC as well as in SIM where there isnt any tutorials or presentations in the class.. where will i learn how to do presentation??

i dunno,it was just a sudden thought that even if i continue to study in SIM,there aren't much use for me,that was what i feel though... coz one thing: SIM wasnt a local university,even if i get a good degree,i am an external student.. i dunno.. plus i heard that there was a higher passing rate at stanfield.. SIM doesnt seems to be a good place to study or what le..

though according to my last year's blogging,i thoroughly enjoyed myself at SIM and i am sure most of my secondary school friends and JC friends are happy for me..

but then now,i realised that people changed.. things are not the same anymore.. life isnt as fun as it was.. suddenly,everybody was busy with their work, studies, girlfriends and boyfriends,etc.. somemore most of our time-table arent the same..it became harder to meet up,to eat lunch together,much more to chat and talk about what exactly is going on in our life.. perhaps we arent even interested in what's happening in each other's life.. perhaps we dun even care in the first place..

friends. what are friends in uni?

they are just for us to make use of.. and guess what after we made use of them? we gossiped and said bad things about them and perhaps if in any way they did something not nice to us or perhaps hurt us..

and when we need them,we will be super nice to them,otherwise,who gives a damn about them..

what a realistic world! i hate it..

and yet i cant reject it,cant stop it.. it is just happening around us.. and perhaps even i myself,i am reacting the same way as well.. for example,messaging someone when i need his/her help..

perhaps it is the way we view things ba.. perhaps if we see things in a different point of view,we wouldnt be thinking of the negative effects of our actions.. perhaps if one day there arent such a thing call friend,everyone will just be a tool for another person to "make use" of.. perhaps you guys may disagree but it is true that we only approached our friends when we needed help,more often than when we have something happy and jovious to share with them..

i am sad,disappointed.. the idea of friends has always been very important to me.. i had always tried means and ways to be as good as my friends and try to stand by them when i needed them.. but then things turned bad and i start to realise that i may be "used" for their convenience.. after i stepped into SIM especially in this year,i learned and discovered what a realistic world i have been living in for the past 20 years.. perhaps i am a bit slow in realising this.. perhaps it is me who doesnt want to realise it.. and now since everyone shows us this perhaps it is time for me to adapt to it as well..

i just reread my blog my private blog i once wrote this:

suddenly i realised that perhaps wad weilun said was right.. there were no friends in this world.. people needed you for a reason.. but whether or not you are acquaintance depends on how much the person needs you..

friends in SIM are nothing but a bunch of blood suckers who suck all the blood that you have and leave you in lurch in cases when you needed help.. i am not saying all,but some of them are like that.. i shall not disclose who.. perhaps years later when i reread this entry,i will not remember that i once felt this way..

yup,i forgot what is the incident that made me feel that way and even wrote on the blog that i seldom update.. only very important or meaningful stuff will i keep a record of it in that blog.. but this incident must have given me a real deep impact that i chose to write about it in that blog..

i guess weilun is right perhaps..

we are all blood suckers..

anyway,i had dinner with brandon at the Terminal 2 staff canteen.. had fried kway teow.. quite nice and yummy and yup no chilli for me.. then after that drink the sugar cane juice.. hehe.. quite nice.. after that we explored the airport transist as he wanted to get sour cream bread from aunt anne.. hmm,never try that before but the taste was weird when he let me try.. lol.. perhaps coz it was the sour cream flavour and i dun like it ba.. next time will try the raisin one.. hehe..

then when we were checking the stocks,i thought i lost the ipod shuffle 1 GB.. but luckily it was sold before i went for dinner and i didnt record as i forgot.. hehe.. wah heng sia.. imagine if all the ipods that i thought i lost were really missing,what i had earned wouldnt have been enough for me to pay for all the missing ipods.. lolz.. anyway,thanks to the cashiers who are super helpful and are willing to help me check plus calm me down when i was panicking.. haha.. i am super blur,i know that.. lolz

after that as i didnt want to go home so early,i asked around to see who is free to go eat supper or stuff like that.. since the next day i was working afternoon shift at bonia,i could afford to go home late.. and as ah-soon wanted to go to a pub at boat quay,i decided to tag along since he asked me anyway after knowing that i didnt want to go home early.. hehe..

headed to raffles place via MRT and we meet the creative ger,yi hui who is super duper quiet de.. hehe.. and the funny thing is that she actually stayed quite near ah-soon at bukit batok there i think..haha.. and there was also the sony people who we are not very close to and hence didnt really interact with them much.. other than that there was also the panasonic people but then since the other two arent that close to them,it wasnt nice for us to go over.. a bit funny also.. haha..

then on the way home we tried to think of ABC for the electronics applications.. eg. A for Apple, B for Braun and C for creative etc.. super lame and funny.. but i am impressed by his knowledge of it though he had worked under braun and those electronics stuff for about 10 months le.. and he is only 17 i guess,though he kept mentioning that he is 24 born in the year of dog (should be chicken la) and his birthday falls on the 32/2/1981.. (should be 23rd feb,if i am not wrong..)

reached the bar but then the bar that we are going to (dream bar) was full and very crowded..and hence we took cab over to tanjong pagar (fantasy bar).. felt pretty welcome there and the people there thought that i was his girlfriend.. diaoz.. coz he never bring any girl to the pub before and i was the first one.. haha.. should i be honoured?? anyway,the bar was more of like a pub whereby they smoke,drink and sing karaoke.. haha.. of course i didnt sing la.. shy mah.. lol.. as if.. anyway,i sing solo not nice de.. and i also dunnoe what to sing,so i didnt sing lo.. lolz.. but then ah soon got ask me to sing with him one song i think is zhi zao lang man.. and so i agreed loh.. hehe..

however,i didnt managed to sing with him,i guess he sang with another girl(stephanie i think..) one of the waitresses there who is also his friend as well.. well coz i shared cab home with another of his friend, elaine.. she wasnt feeling well.. and i was tired as well.. plus there was someone to share cab with me especially since she also stayed at the east,why not? lol.. but felt abit bad like leave him there though he still had friend with him.. haha..

then very funny de,all his friends ask me why i didnt want to wait for him to send me home.. diaoz.. he stay west side,i stay east side.. the taxi fare is gonna be damn high loh.. then super gao xiao,he suggested staying over at my place then next day he can go to work,nearer for him.. lol.. u think i dare let him come over? if i did,i would be slaughtered by my dad i guess.. lol..

anyway,had a great night,perhaps unforgettable.. first time at pub leh.. what do u expect? lol