received personal comments that i think too much..i guess so..i couldn't help it..no choice..i am negative..and i think i am facing depression..nothing makes me laugh from the bottom of my heart anymore..i am more selfish now..no longer thinking about the others..i guess it's part of growing up?i hate me now..i hate myself..but anyway,what can i do?i just gotta continue with my life as it was..it is sucky..but noone cares so why should i??

headed down to sim today..haha..got off at the wrong busstop but anyway,got there..had a chat with the customer service officer..very good and patient with me..hehe..i was not reallie decided with my choice yet and she just patiently explained each course in details and tried to analyse with me,etc..so good rite?yeah,at last i chose bachelor of science in banking and finance..not sure if it was good..but anyway...i dun care...

well,i wished i was like her,with such good talent in speaking..actually,i think a lot of my friends are like that too..and i am not like them..neither am i talented nor do i have a useful skills..i felt useless..bleah,i have been so negative lately..can't help it if my future seems so bleak..haiz..though i have sort of planned the study route for my future but..nobody knows what happened 3 years down the road..nobody can predicts..noone knows..

went out with waiyue and rong today..didn't talk reallie much..except when me and waiyue are waiting for the bus..she said that i dun reallie noe her well..and i guess i admit it..i dun..i am a failure i guess..i am reallie not observant enough..even for eileen's present i gotta delay..hehe..coz i dunnoe what to get for her..=P i dun reallie noe her well i guess..dun understand her..

i am no longer the same..i have become much more heck-care..even to care for my friends..

i am such a failure..

and i hate myself